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The Love Machine

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Weldūn

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« on: <09-02-11/1146:58> »
Okay, a little background. I'm running a Saints Row style campaign where the PCs are the leader and lieutenants of a (currently) minor gang. Now, for those not familiar with the Saint's Row game, one of the activities in it involves driving a car around while a prostitute services a client in the back seat. Now, in my campaign, a rival gang runs the same kind of gig, where the Trick and the Talent are picked up and driven around, providing a mobile and secure environment for the customer.

The Love Machine
Bulldog Stepvan. („35,000)
Middle Amenities. („100)
Pimped Ride - 1 („800)
Spoof Chip („500)
Interior Cameras („1,600)
Road Strip Ejector („800)
Smoke Projector („700)
Oil Slick Sprayer („500)

Total Price - („40,000)

The interior cameras are intended primarily for security, but also provide another revenue stream with amateur porn production when work is slow. Can't have too much of the talent idle, now can we? 8) They are VERY RARELY used for blackmail, as that type of extortion is risky business.
Cleverly disguised as an adult.

Which I think is sort of like arguing that a partial erection should get all the benefits of an erection.

Red Canti

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« Reply #1 on: <09-02-11/1233:23> »
Hmm, seems like a nice enough ride. Do you have anything to insure the client's privacy? Wouldn't want the guy driving it to get...distracted. I'm thinking something like that window they have between the passenger and driver in Limos.
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FastJack

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« Reply #2 on: <09-02-11/1236:39> »
Hmm, seems like a nice enough ride. Do you have anything to insure the client's privacy? Wouldn't want the guy driving it to get...distracted. I'm thinking something like that window they have between the passenger and driver in Limos.
Having known a few guys that worked as bouncers and DJ's at fully nude strip clubs (where there's shower shows and such), I can report back what they feel about that sort of stuff.

"After a while, it's no longer distracting."

Weldūn

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« Reply #3 on: <09-02-11/1242:59> »
Hmm, seems like a nice enough ride. Do you have anything to insure the client's privacy? Wouldn't want the guy driving it to get...distracted. I'm thinking something like that window they have between the passenger and driver in Limos.
Having known a few guys that worked as bouncers and DJ's at fully nude strip clubs (where there's shower shows and such), I can report back what they feel about that sort of stuff.

"After a while, it's no longer distracting."
I'm a Licensed Security Officer and Crowd Control Officer. Yeah, pretty much, so that's probably why I overlooked it. Still, it's not a bad point but with the middle-class amenities we can assume that privacy screens are a part of that.
« Last Edit: <09-02-11/1244:44> by Weldūn »
Cleverly disguised as an adult.

Which I think is sort of like arguing that a partial erection should get all the benefits of an erection.

Kontact

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« Reply #4 on: <09-03-11/0401:28> »
Needs some sort of biometric locks.

Ya know, to make sure that it don't work for nobody but you.

Makki

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« Reply #5 on: <09-03-11/0409:34> »
I would offer my clients better than middle amenities.

beowulf_of_wa

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« Reply #6 on: <09-03-11/1337:24> »
for low lifestyle skanks willing to shag in a van?? ever seen bangbus? that would be a totally unmodified dodge van, so maybe street lifestyle? or low at best?
Carpe Noctem (seize the night)
Carpe per Diem (seize the pay), Carpe Dentum (seize the teeth), Carpe Denim (seize the pants)
Carpe Panem (seize the bread/capital)

no, i won't "just get over it."

NERPS!! for idiocy! NERPS!! for the minty fresh feeling! NERPS!! for gods! NERPS!! for guard duty!

Red Canti

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« Reply #7 on: <09-03-11/1338:15> »
I would offer my clients better than middle amenities.
It's a blowjob van not a celebrity limo.
"Always Trust Mr. Johnson, always. Just make sure he knows he'd regret betraying that trust."

CanRay

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« Reply #8 on: <09-03-11/1413:03> »
for low lifestyle skanks willing to shag in a van?? ever seen bangbus? that would be a totally unmodified dodge van, so maybe street ifestyle? or low at best?
This is a Hippie-esque Shaggin' Wagon, however!  We're talking plush carpeting on the floor, walls, and ceiling!  Discoball!  And Fine Corinthian Leather Bench Seats!

And a amazon warrior slaying a dragon painted on the side.

And Moby Dick's Bong.
Si vis pacem, para bellum

#ThisTaserGoesTo11

beowulf_of_wa

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« Reply #9 on: <09-03-11/1620:25> »
for low lifestyle skanks willing to shag in a van?? ever seen bangbus? that would be a totally unmodified dodge van, so maybe street ifestyle? or low at best?
This is a Hippie-esque Shaggin' Wagon, however!  We're talking plush carpeting on the floor, walls, and ceiling!  Discoball!  And Fine Corinthian Leather Bench Seats!

And a amazon warrior slaying a dragon painted on the side.

And Moby Dick's Bong.

don't lie, it's only the finest Louisiana Juggernaut Synthahyde that 4 minutes of 2XS porn can pay for.
Carpe Noctem (seize the night)
Carpe per Diem (seize the pay), Carpe Dentum (seize the teeth), Carpe Denim (seize the pants)
Carpe Panem (seize the bread/capital)

no, i won't "just get over it."

NERPS!! for idiocy! NERPS!! for the minty fresh feeling! NERPS!! for gods! NERPS!! for guard duty!

CanRay

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« Reply #10 on: <09-03-11/1629:05> »
What gutter did you find something as ancient as 2XS chips in?
Si vis pacem, para bellum

#ThisTaserGoesTo11

beowulf_of_wa

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« Reply #11 on: <09-03-11/1742:33> »
hehehehehe i'll never tell.
Carpe Noctem (seize the night)
Carpe per Diem (seize the pay), Carpe Dentum (seize the teeth), Carpe Denim (seize the pants)
Carpe Panem (seize the bread/capital)

no, i won't "just get over it."

NERPS!! for idiocy! NERPS!! for the minty fresh feeling! NERPS!! for gods! NERPS!! for guard duty!

Angelone

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« Reply #12 on: <09-03-11/2100:45> »
I would kill for a Moby Dick's bong, or Aladdin's hookah.
REJOICE! For bad things are about to happen.
la vida no vale nada

CanRay

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« Reply #13 on: <09-03-11/2307:36> »
I would kill for a Moby Dick's bong, or Aladdin's hookah.
It's a Supernatural reference.  Even comes up later.

"What's the last thing you remember before you came here?"  "To be honest?  My second bong hit."
Si vis pacem, para bellum

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Angelone

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« Reply #14 on: <09-03-11/2327:57> »
Still it be epic 8)

REJOICE! For bad things are about to happen.
la vida no vale nada