The codified rules for spirit relations is a bad decision imo, I guess maybe its nice for living campaigns to have set guidelines. But I can guarantee if I used those rules every mage within 5 sessions even the most abusive summoner would have +10 spirit relations. And then the already over powered spirits would be handing out services for free.
Well, much like there's a rule for preventing edge abuse, I'd say that a GM should be using the same sort of common sense with regards to reputation. Something I noticed was +1 rep for releasing a spirit with services remaining? Lol, ok so a power gamer will summon a force 1, get a ton of services, take no drain, and then dismiss it for the +1 AsRep? Well, no, not at any reasonable GM's table. Hell, at my table I'd consider giving you MINUS 1 AsRep due to bothering the spirit just for your own benefit... and as a meta warning to quit trying to game the system.
I see it the opposite way as you do with regards to organized play, heh. In a home game you know the GM is the law, as opposed to any rule or rulebook. And in a home game, you (usually) have the same GM consistently, so that GM's sensibilities can be anticipated and expected. In organized play you have a sort of a Weak GM paradigm because, well, the table GM is really just an "assistant" GM when you look at it.. the "real" GM is the organized play campaign rules! Table variation about whether or not action X results in +/- Y AsRep is the bane of consistency.
I like the concept of AsRep (even if I hate that abbreviation). Metahuman contacts have Loyalty, which also goes up and down based on how you treat them, so the concept of a Spirit Loyalty rating has an established analogue. I do agree though that GM needs to lay down the law and override the player when they say "but the book says this gives me +1 AsRep!", or else everyone will just permanently maintain 10 AsRep.